Big Boys Hobbies

So called detecting buddy

Dreams

Dreams

New Member
Joined
Mar 10, 2019
Messages
14
Location
Occidental Ca,
I met a guy while out detecting a couple of years ago. We seemed to hit it off with many of the same interests. We hunted dozens of times together at mostly my permissions. He found a good spot and hit it hard before inviting me. He pretty much cleaned it out. He was trying to get permission for a site across the street from the one he cleaned out. We talked about that site many times and the potential of finding some good stuff. He had recently met another guy on Facebook and they hunted a couple of times together. He invited him to one of my sites without asking me. That pissed me off!Then he got the permission to hunt the site that we had talked about and invited that guy and not me. He actually texted me and told me this.That really pissed me off! Needless to say, I'm done with his friendship. From now on I will find my own spots and hunt alone. My sites were far more productive than his and he found very few.
 
Sounds like a good lesson learned. People will either be gifts or lessons in your life. Give thanks for what you've learned from him-even if he isn't in your circle of friends any more. Happy hunting!
 
I've found some of my best friends in the metal detecting hobby since I began metal detecting in 2010, and I have also lost a couple of long time friends, due the hobby, after getting them in the hobby. There is just something unique in people's greed aspects, all for a simple Mercury dime sometimes. We detectorists can all be quirky. I can myself anyways.

There is just so much competition, for the remaining treasure spots. Dog eat dog. A decent private permission is like having the lotto numbers in advance. Greed, just simple greed.
 
Here's one of my stories -- I got permission at a high profile private property site that can be seen from a main road. So this guy drives up, gets all geared up, and asks "may I join you?"

I so "no", I worked this permission (they know me, they don't know you), so, instead of leaving, he goes to the far end of the old field I am working.

After about an hour and a half, he comes over and says he's leaving cuz he hasn't found anything. Site is hunted out he says.

Well, I found 19 silvers in that field including a barber half, and 47 silvers overall on the property.

Maybe there is karma, maybe there is not, I dunno, but that's my story.

I am generally disappointed with the people I have met in this hobby, but I have met some good apples.

Unless I can find someone who values friendship above competition, I will prefer to hunt alone.
 
amc rulz said:
Has happened to me also. It’s all really petty, not worth getting worked up over.
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Losing a prime permission is worth getting worked up over. Just saying. It is here in Texas anyways. Y'all in the original 13 states may have treasure everywhere. We don't.
 
My friend of many years was my detecting buddy, but he always got… strange. Only child. If we didn't find something within an hour he just sat down and would claim there’s nothing there. I’m talking a 40-acre park. We’d search one part and if no treasures, he’d just hang the detector up. I found it very annoying and so now I just go alone.
 
Skwerly said:
My friend of many years was my detecting buddy, but he always got… strange. Only child. If we didn't find something within an hour he just sat down and would claim there’s nothing there. I’m talking a 40-acre park. We’d search one part and if no treasures, he’d just hang the detector up. I found it very annoying and so now I just go alone.
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I hesitate to go detecting with others for this reason. Unless they are patient and willing to give it a full day effort, I go alone. I don't mind a buddy finding great finds on my permissions, but I do hate them acting bored and wanting to leave before we even get started!
 
ElkGroveNox said:
Here I have been just trying to find someone to go with, the stories I’m reading Maby I should just go alone 😆
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I hope we didn't sour you too much. Like I said, there are good apples out there.

Meet at a park, rather than your permission or their permission. If you hit it off, go from there. Some people have life long hunting buddies, and you do not want to foreclose on that possibility.

I will say, however, unless you are friends first, it is probably best to find someone at a similar skill level.

JMHO
 
randy said:
I hope we didn't sour you too much. Like I said, there are good apples out there.

Meet at a park, rather than your permission or their permission. If you hit it off, go from there. Some people have life long hunting buddies, and you do not want to foreclose on that possibility.

I will say, however, unless you are friends first, it is probably best to find someone at a similar skill level.

JMHO
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Very good advice!
 
Stiffwrists said:
I hesitate to go detecting with others for this reason. Unless they are patient and willing to give it a full day effort, I go alone. I don't mind a buddy finding great finds on my permissions, but I do hate them acting bored and wanting to leave before we even get started!
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"but I do hate them acting bored and wanting to leave before we even get started!"

This was my latest finding with my last personal friend. I simply quit joining. Actually, I ducked going out with him.

It is sad how "true flakes" some people can be in personality.
 
I like to hunt with my brother. I have known him to be an a-hole for 59 years(I won't count his first year being a baby and all) so I am never suprised! JK....well maybe.
 
Dreams said:
..... He found a good spot and hit it hard before inviting me. He pretty much cleaned it out. ....
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Fortunately most md'rs aren't like that. Most do "tit-for-tat". This certainly will make you think twice about tit-for-tat with THAT guy, but I wouldn't let it spoil your thoughts about making other friends in the future. I've found that most md'rs I share My prized sites, with reciprocate when it comes their turn to find a good site. Bummer story :no:
 
Tom_in_CA said:
Fortunately most md'rs aren't like that. Most do "tit-for-tat". This certainly will make you think twice about tit-for-tat with THAT guy, but I wouldn't let it spoil your thoughts about making other friends in the future. I've found that most md'rs I share My prized sites, with reciprocate when it comes their turn to find a good site. Bummer story :no:
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That's the way I feel. The more research and Ideas the better. I turned this guy on to the best site that either one of us had ever hunted. He found his first and only Barber there and I was excited for him.I guess I can't trust anybody.
 
Dreams said:
That's the way I feel. The more research and Ideas the better. I turned this guy on to the best site that either one of us had ever hunted. He found his first and only Barber there and I was excited for him.I guess I can't trust anybody.
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Ha Ha, how dare he! :lol:
 
Dreams said:
....I guess I can't trust anybody.
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As I said in post #15 : Those type persons are not the norm. And this shouldn't let you partner again with others. Ie.: No reason to "become a hermit md'r" .

If you hash these things out ahead of time, then the reciprocation tit-for-tat factor is *normally* understood.

To the extent there can be violators, then sure, so too can there be thieves who rob banks, etc.... It's bound to happen. But this doesn't take away from our ability to form future friendships, relationships, etc..... Otherwise : We become hermits :(
 
Honestly? Haven't most all of us snuck ahead, or onto a permission we were gifted to, coming from a veteran who was helping us? I did. I admit it.
 
Martin_V3i said:
Honestly? Haven't most all of us snuck ahead, or onto a permission we were gifted to, coming from a veteran who was helping us? I did. I admit it.
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I've tested the waters on sites before inviting someone. This particular guy that I am talking about had only one day to hunt the place he got permission on. I got wind of one place near me and dug a barber dime within 10 minutes of being there. I took a pic and texted him to get his butt over there asap. There were several other permissions that I got where I invited him before stepping foot on the property. I am fully aware now of what he is up to. The guy that he invited has some spots that he wants to hunt and doesn't want me involved. I believe in "Do unto others" Don't you?
 
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