Old Town
moved on...
This probably belongs in another forum but I thought more people would see it here. It's regarding the Friends aspect of forums and why I do not participate in it.
In the past few days I've had some very nice folks ask to be "friends". I've had to explain to them I'm not involved in that and have gotten the feeling I've hurt some feelings. I guess this is a natural reaction to someone openly telling you to bugger off. (but in a nice way, I really try to be nice and explain my reasons)
I though I'd explain it here, in the open, to head off my having to do this privately in the future if some misguided member actually feels me worthy of friendship.
I'm a member of two other forums, one on sailing and another shooting forum. A few years ago one of my Friends told me he'd like to visit with me on his vacation in Key West. I agreed and we made a time of 2pm. I even gave him my home address which is about the dumbest thing a human can do. This guy was from the shooting forum and he had always seemed perfectly okay online. Even charming at times. I liked the way he wrote and thought him very bright.
Come the day, he shows up at 10am and dressed in camo clothing. He had on full paramilitary regalia and was covered in tatoos. Tatoos are not so bad, but to display an image of an African American hanging by a tree limb on the upper arm is not something I'm comfortable with. He also had swastikas and other White Brotherhood stamps all over. He even had his sleeves cut off at the shoulder to display his artwork of inner-most desires.
The Illustrated Man wanted to go bar hopping right then and there. He's still on the doorstep. I'm quickly going through the options in my head on how to dispose of this thing that I brought on myself. I'm a big guy, well over 6 feet and 200 pounds. I'm in very good physical shape but actually felt a twinge of intimidation by what stood before me. We all like to think we're tough guys but this intruder had me spooked. He looked genuinely nuts. I only fake nuts when it serves me at the moment. Illustrated Man was the real McCoy.
As it turned out, I managed to get rid of him but not without some uncomfortable conversation, and not without me staying up at night for a few days watching my back door. Nothing ever did come of it but you never can tell about a person until you've looked them in the eye and gotten a feel for what's inside. Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I like to join with people in person and by natural selection to decide if they are going to be a friend or not.
The Friends thing is mostly a harmless desire of online members to feel some kind of connection with another poster whose style they like. I understand this and appreciate the sentiment. I'd just rather pass on this aspect of forum life. I'm still watching my back door on nights when it's dark and windy and it's spooky outside. The Illustrated Man is still out there somewhere.
Old Town
In the past few days I've had some very nice folks ask to be "friends". I've had to explain to them I'm not involved in that and have gotten the feeling I've hurt some feelings. I guess this is a natural reaction to someone openly telling you to bugger off. (but in a nice way, I really try to be nice and explain my reasons)
I though I'd explain it here, in the open, to head off my having to do this privately in the future if some misguided member actually feels me worthy of friendship.
I'm a member of two other forums, one on sailing and another shooting forum. A few years ago one of my Friends told me he'd like to visit with me on his vacation in Key West. I agreed and we made a time of 2pm. I even gave him my home address which is about the dumbest thing a human can do. This guy was from the shooting forum and he had always seemed perfectly okay online. Even charming at times. I liked the way he wrote and thought him very bright.
Come the day, he shows up at 10am and dressed in camo clothing. He had on full paramilitary regalia and was covered in tatoos. Tatoos are not so bad, but to display an image of an African American hanging by a tree limb on the upper arm is not something I'm comfortable with. He also had swastikas and other White Brotherhood stamps all over. He even had his sleeves cut off at the shoulder to display his artwork of inner-most desires.
The Illustrated Man wanted to go bar hopping right then and there. He's still on the doorstep. I'm quickly going through the options in my head on how to dispose of this thing that I brought on myself. I'm a big guy, well over 6 feet and 200 pounds. I'm in very good physical shape but actually felt a twinge of intimidation by what stood before me. We all like to think we're tough guys but this intruder had me spooked. He looked genuinely nuts. I only fake nuts when it serves me at the moment. Illustrated Man was the real McCoy.
As it turned out, I managed to get rid of him but not without some uncomfortable conversation, and not without me staying up at night for a few days watching my back door. Nothing ever did come of it but you never can tell about a person until you've looked them in the eye and gotten a feel for what's inside. Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I like to join with people in person and by natural selection to decide if they are going to be a friend or not.
The Friends thing is mostly a harmless desire of online members to feel some kind of connection with another poster whose style they like. I understand this and appreciate the sentiment. I'd just rather pass on this aspect of forum life. I'm still watching my back door on nights when it's dark and windy and it's spooky outside. The Illustrated Man is still out there somewhere.
Old Town
