T. S. A. It's always something with them !

Wom 27

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I know sooooo many people would " rather be safe " and therefor are fine with any delay, indignity, etc. they have to endur to be safe but sometimes..... Let me say, I've had knee replacements for thirty years and have always lite up metal detectors since before TSA. Once they wanted me to drop my drarwers in the middle of the airport! ( like that was going to happen ). Today, I went back outside for a smoke , came back and lite up the X-ray machine ( didn't do that the first time thru ). He asked me to turn around and see that my wrist and groin came up hot. Now, I've had my junk felt up before by these people and I can live with it but I hate when common sense is ignored. I asked if my wrist liters up and I am wearing no jewelry and I have a short sleeve shirt on, doesn't that mean the machine is wrong ? Well??? " look, all I know is that if the machine liters up, you're getting a pat down !" So , for the 100 th time, I had my junk shifted around by the back of some stranger's hand.
Meanwhile they asked the guy in front of me to empty his pockets. He pulled out a huge roll of cash in both hands. So much that he was dropping cash on the floor. I asked why they didn't at least ask him some questions and was told he was allowed ten thousand dollars cash. I asked how much do you think he was carrying and was ignored. These rolls had to be 3 inches across. If it was me, I would at least have taken the opportunity to feel his junk ! It's only fare !!
 
I'm probably skating on thin ice here, but you've got me on the soapbox, now.

It's Feb. of 2004, and my Nat'l Guard unit is coming back from a deployment to Egypt. We get diverted to Des Moines due to a snowfall in Waterloo.
We're on a chartered plane, full of nothing but military, and we're carrying our automatic weapons with us on the plane. A good portion of us get off the plane for a pit stop, and a batch of us step out for a smoke. On the way back in, we are ordered, by TSA to remove our boots and empty our pockets. I turned and looked at the Battalion Commander, and he just shook his head at me. (He knew me well enough to know what I was thinking.)
I was "this close" to telling them to do something unmentionable to themselves. I mean, here we were, military men, in uniform coming back home, and "our" supposed "airport security" won't even trust their own military.
Right there, I made a personal vow to NEVER fly commercial again. As far as I'm concerned, commercial aviation can die a long, slow horrible death, and I won't feel one ounce of pity for it.

Stepping down, now, before I get shown the door.

Roger
 
I'm probably skating on thin ice here, but you've got me on the soapbox, now.

It's Feb. of 2004, and my Nat'l Guard unit is coming back from a deployment to Egypt. We get diverted to Des Moines due to a snowfall in Waterloo.
We're on a chartered plane, full of nothing but military, and we're carrying our automatic weapons with us on the plane. A good portion of us get off the plane for a pit stop, and a batch of us step out for a smoke. On the way back in, we are ordered, by TSA to remove our boots and empty our pockets. I turned and looked at the Battalion Commander, and he just shook his head at me. (He knew me well enough to know what I was thinking.)
I was "this close" to telling them to do something unmentionable to themselves. I mean, here we were, military men, in uniform coming back home, and "our" supposed "airport security" won't even trust their own military.
Righother t there, I made a personal vow to NEVER fly commercial again. As far as I'm concerned, commercial aviation can die a long, slow horrible death, and I won't feel one ounce of pity for it.

Stepping down, now, before I get shown the door.

Roger

One of the main troubles with TSA is "no profiling allowed". Other countries take profiling to an art form but if we see someone with Nazi tats,no hair and rings in his nose, we have to treat him the same as our military. Thus, you get searched
I was traveling with my very old father once and his shoelaces were dragging behind him and it just didn't seem right. I asked the agent" do you know this man landed on Normandy and you're making his day harder than need be" his reply was " they put bombs in baby carriages ". Well you can't argue with that.
 
So, I'm in Afghanistan for a bit. After my business is taken care of I head for Bagram AB to get a military flight back to another ME hole. I'm standing there in uniform with a backpack, body armor, Kevlar helmet. M4 240 rounds of 556, M9 45 rounds of 9mm and a Gerber Multi tool in a case on my belt. The Australian female airman running the check in says I have to put my Gerber in my checked baggage. I lol and she says Colonel, did I say something funny? I say you were serious? I give her my best you've got to be shi_ing me look and slip my Gerber into my backpack. This really happened.


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I live on a tiny island, so if I want to go anywhere else on the planet it's basically fly or take a 2 week ferry ride.

So I fly a lot.

And, man, the frustration level is through the roof!

Yesterday (actually, literally yesterday) I was flying back home from a backpacking trip and had my soon-to-be-checked bag (big backpack) put through the scanner before checking it. Oh-- that looks like a camp stove: we must investigate. I pull out the camp stove which I use specifically because it is airplane safe. It is an empty can with holes around the top which can be filled with alcohol and lit with a match to cook on (no fuel or ignition mechanism whatsoever). It's empty, clean, dry-- utterly and plainly harmless, and I tell the agents as much. They (very politely, since this is Japan) take my ticket and my can/stove and tell me to wait while they find somebody who knows what to do. I wait for an hour and as it gets dangerously close to time for my flight to board (and I've lost my chance to go have lunch) a supervisor arrives with a physical book the size of two bibles stacked on top of each other. He first discusses the situation at length with the agents who are holding my ticket and stove hostage, and then (smiling brightly) comes and shows me a section of the rule book pointing out that they are allowed to prohibit from checked luggage "any container that may have previously contained fuel or alcohol." He goes on to say that there are a number of tests that they can perform to ensure that such a container is safe to bring on board, but most of them take a very long time. He, however, is going to do me the favor of allowing a quicker test: igniting a lighter inside the can to make sure nothing catches on fire (spoiler alert: nothing caught fire). Finally got my ticket back, was allowed to stick the stove back in my pack and check my bag, and barely made it onto my flight. So much frustration!

You're right-- it's always something.:mad:
 
My body is full of implants, including in my brain. Sometimes I set off the detectors, sometimes not. I figure someday I'll set it off and will hear, "we better open it up and take a look".
 
That is weird, because, if you were to get pulled over while driving, and they saw you had that much on you, you would be doing mucho explaining. :yes:

Plus, you'd lose it all and spend years in court trying to get it back. Last flight I took was in 97. If it isn't within a few days travel by car or motorcycle I'm probably not interested in going.
 
Southpark did a documentary all aspiring air travelers should view...so you know what to expect from the TSA Security Agents.....

I'm pretty much invisible to most of the general Public...I can walk into a Waffle House, Walmart, or Church and not get a welcome, I can wander around at Area 51 trapping coyotes with no trouble...I once spent a weekend at the Whitehouse camping out in the Rose Garden...At Family reunions I have to wear a name tag! So yeah...nobody in the general day to day world notices me, a real Grey Man if you will.... I can go and do anything I please..Like Patrick Swayze in the movie 'Ghost', except I'm fat and bald headed and dont particularly care for Whoopi Goldberg...

BUT! Panhandlers, Criminally Insane, and TSA agents! To them, I'm lit up like a 9' tall chartreuse Christmas tree wearing an orange Highway construction barrel as a hat!! Bums will cross 6 lanes of Atlanta traffic to ask me for a dollar!! Insane peoples eyes instantly glow Blue like some sort of LOTR Elvish Blade and want to engage me in coccamamie Nibiru conversation!! TSA agents radio for backup before I even get my car parked! Then the 'Flying Monkeys' pull me out of line and rip me apart like the scarecrow on the Wizard of Oz and scatter my stuffings all over the floor!

I dont fly anymore on account of it!...I'll drive...If I have to sit in the middle seat next to an Insane person babbling on about crazy stuff on one side, and a poor smelly old alcoholic bum on the other, I prefer to be alone with myself! I can easily handle Him barehanded like always! Without a blue glove!........:laughing:

Yeah, I'm Super invisible to most of the World...At my Funeral viewing someday...there will probably be just a few balloons and an empty display casket, maybe a few street bums will show up, or my crazy relatives? Little sign saying: "Nothing to see here, move along"...TSA pawl bearers going through my pockets and checking for gold teeth fillings like rifling through a beer cooler for the last bottle of Corona...

TSA Agents have gotta be recruited from the lower echelons of Bums and Insane street people population, or Congress...a bunch of Global damn dummies that have never stopped up nothing but a Taco Bell toilet! Some kind of Gov State sponsored 'Job Werks' program or sumpthin' is all I can figure....

I applied, thought it would be easy money standing around wearing a snappy uniform in a comfortable environment without a whole lot of expectations for performance...Looking serious and waving around a Garrett wand? Sure! I'm your huckleberry! Never got a interview callback though..Just not crazy enough to qualify yet..maybe the TSA HR dept 'profiles' potential candidates and is looking specifically for Minelabbers?....:laughing:
 
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I usually just tell them I'm a detectorist and have already done a self-scan. Then I just walk right through.
 
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