Calvin and Hobbs Kinda Gear!
"Its a magical World Hobbs old Buddy...Lets go exploring! (Bill Watterson)
Of course, to really go afoot on this Dangerous Planet, exploring and exploiting in good fashion, in addition to a pet Tiger, a guy needs a Trustworthy Man bag!
...here comes a MudPuppy ramble...Just let me run a little Brothers!...
Back in the day, before Cellphones, Onstar and LifeAlert, (helpivefallenandicantgetup!) Men had to rely on themselves and their gear, there were these things called "Possible Pouches"...Contained within was everything a guy needed to start life over or survive a bad situation. Flint and steel, a blade, sinew, jerky, tobacco, even trade items like beads. Now a days these pouches are commonly referred to as "Bug Out Bags", or 'Bobs' for short...Made out of various grades and configurations of ripstop nylon, they are a popular and important piece of kit. Every body needs one, something you can grab quick in an emergency that will save your life or allow you to start a new one. It should never be out of arms reach in fact, you should use it as a pillow even!
Well, a good all purpose innocent looking bag is a tool in and of itself, so I have been thinking a lot about bags since Ozarkhunter got his!
As a somewhat palsied pathetic periperdontic, wandering this Globe so far on 6 continents, what a guy has on hand is of great importance! Hell! A few packs of Marlboros and a Bic lighter in some localities makes a huge difference between life and death! Got me through a high mountain armed roadblock in Bosnia once! Late at night too...I remember looking up at the stars, with a sense of peace about my fate, I had fire and smokes...Toss in some beads, and a guy is golden!
Per my tag line, Pockets are untrustworthy! Briefcases are limited and anounce, "hey, look at me!" Fanny packs? Sheesh! I dont even need to address that do I?
It screams 'Hey everybody! I'm gay as hell! heres my passport and all my money!'
Anyway, a really good Scavengers bag...yep...a guy can make shoes out of it if it came to it, or a hat, or carry water like this waxed one Ozark found...
Think about it! Mattie Ross of 'True Grit' carried her daddies 1847 Colt Walker in a cotton flour sack! She walked right into the courtroom with it even, and nobody said dick!! Her conversation with that one horse trader is legendary and should be committed to memory by others so inclined to get the top end of a negotiation! 'Art of the Deal' my @ss! Trump aint got NOTHING on Mattie Ross when it comes to horse trading! Then, she whipped out that big hand cannon and shot Tom Chaney! Loved it!
Ok...so thinking about a good honest ManBag...back in the early 80's, dirt poor, about this time of the year, probably mid May, gainfully unemployed as is my custom, with a New baby and Wife...Living In St Cloud MN, I bought 50c worth of Fatheads and drove on up to the Blanchard Dam on the Mississippi river...there was this little creek that dumped in below there a few miles, and the Walleye staged up there for the spawn...(west side of the river, right at that first downstream bridge...y'all know exactly what I'm talking about!) ...My $300 Plymouth Volare with the slant six got there amazingly, it was a stick, and luckily a guy could roll start it easy...so down in there I go to catch a ration of fish...May apples were just popping up, sprigs of poison ivy, and then I noticed a great carpet of fresh Morels!
Well, All I had was my minnow bucket with about 8 fatheads in it, so I thought about this conundrum, I guess I could take off my shirt and fashion a sack out of it? Or dump out my minnows and grab all these shrooms? So what I did was go and catch some walleye, then used the minnow bucket and my shirt for the shrooms...This is just one little instance where a good bag woulda come in handy!
The old guy who lived next door got three of the walleye and half of the shrooms...he had a hell of a garden, and made some fabulous rhubarb wine... He was like 90yrs old and a great friend and mentor...
Anyway, Manbags! Yes...a guy needs a trustworthy Manbag! Something a fellow can trust not to loose the goods! A Knife like a 770t Schrade, a Zippo lighter, fishing line and a few hooks, zip ties and snares and maybe a space blanket? Like Tom Hanks experienced in 'Joe Vs the Volcano' his quality luggage saved his @ss! A good waxed bag can be used as a flotation device in a pinch! No need to take off your pants and tie knots in the legs like they teach you how to do in the Boy Scouts!
Wandering ashore in your underwear all penniless is no way to go through life! Big deal! You made it ashore in your underwear, you look like hell, and aint gotta penny! Pretty much just another ordinary off the shelf drunken tourist!
OK, so back to detecting and honest pouches...back in Sept of 2013, I was out detecting in lake Michigan..it was @5am..dark side of the moon and running with no lights as is my custom, so it was really dark! I hit this one signal that sounded like a couple pulltabs...I took a few scoops and got it...bounced it around in my hand a little, I didnt know what it was, dog chain maybe? But with no good honest bag, I stuffed it up under the sleeve of my UnderArmour long top (poor mans wetsuit) and commenced to hunting...everytime I lowered that arm to do a scoop, that heavy chain would tumble out, and I would have to fish it up out of the drink again! It was only after I got home did I realize what it was, and nearly fainted..so yeah, a good bag...with that paracord drawstring...for turtles and snakes and mushrooms and such...old guys should gift these to the young, and tell them the history of Mankinds need for possible bags and Mattie Ross' negotiation skills, and Joe's luggage, and rhubarb wine....along with a Zippo and a Schrade...maybe some Marlboros even...
Magical or not, this World is a dangerous Place to be out aimlessly scavenging and adventuring without the right gear, and not all of us are blessed to have a pet Tiger for a backup!!
Mud